Freedom to be!

Livy Brooke, These past 4 months have brought big changes to our lives. First of all, you turned 2!!! I still can't believe my sweet baby girl is 2 and I accidentally call you "baby girl" all the time...perhaps I'm living in denial that you are growing up to be a little lady faster than I'd like! Second, you became a big sister to baby Ethan (the "bruddah" -- you also call him "Eee-fan" which is super cute). I'm proud of the sister that you are to him -- you love to squeeze him, touch him and you already look out for him ("Eee-fan's crying!" "Eee-fan's awake!"). I know you two will be close, loving, playful siblings and that makes my heart happy...although you might need to learn how to share your Thomas the Trains with him :)

Today we went for a family walk. At one point during our walk you asked to get out of the stroller and "hop on the squares" --> you wanted to jump from one garden square stone to another. As you did, you let out beautiful squeals of delight -- full of glee, joy and life! There's such a beauty and innocence to the joy that you have. As I pushed you on the swings this evening, you let out a joyful "waaaahooooo" and even a "chugga chugga chooo choo" -- announcing to everyone in the world that you were loving that swing. My heart melted because you haven't felt the sting of rejection yet. Although your friends occasionally don't want to go on the playground when you *ask* them to, you are not personally offended or feeling downcast from rejection. Never once have you been told you are not good enough or not worthy of time and attention. You do not carry around the heavy weight of rejection and it is a beautiful thing. So precious, my eyes fill up with tears at what has been lost in my life and what I never want you to lose. So my dear, I will do everything in my power to protect you from hurtful people who may make you feel insignificant or who speak lies about your value. Do not believe these things if you do encounter them. Remember the joy you have for life...even if you continue to yell train noises in glee, do it as long as you are being yourself :)

In that same vein, I want to live out freedom in this area as an example to you. I do not want past rejections and hurts to prevent me from being who God created me to be. I want to have a restoration of my simple joy and laughter....without a care as to what people may think. So I pray that the Lord would restore me from hurts, failures and rejections so that I can freely live. You my dear may also walk in that freedom, knowing that God made you and loves you so deeply it hurts.

I posted these photos of you with your daddy because no one brings out the silly in you (and the giggles) like him. Love, your mommy

Fear NOT!

Dear Sweet Alivia, You are a whopping 21.5 months old and are getting bigger, stronger and smarter each month. I'm continually amazed at all that you are learning, remembering and saying. You are more and more precious to me each day.

The more I see you learn and grow, the more amazed I am at your child-like faith and fearlessness. You are not afraid to try to say a new word, or to act a bit silly, or to even trip and fall in front of a huge crowd of people. You're not afraid of mocking words, being laughed at and your feelings aren't hurt we correct your behavior. Right now, you are a model of fearlessness to me...you inspire me to live without a fear of man. AND to not mock, belittle or humiliate others who may try and fail. I never want to hurt, mock, humiliate you and I'm always going to do my best to encourage and support you.

I don't want to instill fear into your heart and mind; I don't want the fears and anxieties that have plagued me to also plague you. So I'm doing my best to give those up to God so I can model fearlessness to you too. I don't want you to be so sheltered that you don't realize this world is a hard place and think that bad things never happen BUT I want you to have faith in the Lord more powerful than any fears, any evil, or any hurts. It is in that place that you will find freedom, joy and peace. That is my heart's cry for you right now. You are my love! From, your momma